


Thieves in the night

by DigiConjurer



Series: The unsorted adventures of Princess Byleth and the Black Eagles [54]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Black Eagles Route, Multi, Pre-Timeskip | Academy Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Robbery, Tea, Vandalism, chapter 5
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:48:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24547891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DigiConjurer/pseuds/DigiConjurer
Summary: In which we steal a tea set and nothing goes wro- Of course, things don't work out as planned.
Relationships: Caspar von Bergliez/Linhardt von Hevring, Dorothea Arnault/My Unit | Byleth, Edelgard von Hresvelg/Bernadetta von Varley
Series: The unsorted adventures of Princess Byleth and the Black Eagles [54]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1463725





	1. Heading in

I don't own fire emblem.

* * *

The day had finally arrived. Sure, the actual planning for this mess of a job had only really occurred a couple days ago and left for just a short time to actually go through the motions.

“Is everyone ready?” Byleth remarked, her student’s gazes locking right onto her for the moment. Squished into Mercedes's minivan outside of some fancy museum, she was surprised to even have their full attention. Though, that could be the result of her being more interesting than whatever was outside the vehicle. 

“I was born ready.” Caspar announced, trying his hardest to not mess with his getup. “Just give me the word. I and Catherine will make the greatest distraction around!”

Catherine rolled her eyes. Getting into a fistfight with someone that was both younger and smaller than her wasn’t quite her style, this was for the benefit of all her classmates. And to some extent, Rhea. Sure, it was also likely that Shamir had tailed this van on either a bike or a car of her own. Wouldn’t be that surprising. Kind of like all the times that Azura tried to convince Corrin she was the one for her after the whole ‘incest’ incident. That was quite a mess to just take in. Especially since it took place right after Mozu and I’s wedding. Truly the kind of news you want to be hearing after your big day. Said no one ever in the history of both Hoshido and Nohr. Like seriously, did she really need to make that much of a big stink about it? She didn’t want you because you were forcing a kind of relationship that wasn’t going to work. What part of that is so hard to understand? It isn’t, but when you’re stressed out on your big day, the temptation to say some less than nice things is thick in the air. Which was on top of all the other things that had seemed ready to burst for- Oh dear. I’ve gotten onto quite a tangent. Sorry about that, viewer. Been a bit since we’ve done one of these. That’s beyond the point though, the doors of the minivan opening up and our two fighters bailing out. Good of a time as any to look at this fancy museum and all its exterior has to offer. Large marble pillars flank the front, holding up a large roof of red roofing tiles. You know, the ones that are all curved and stuff. Those ones. As for security features, we have ourselves a handful of security cameras… but no guards. You would think at this hour that they would at lea-

Right on cue, the sound of the one and only guard getting hit by an arrow echoed about the area. Guess that answers my question for the moment. Seems like someone decided to come along for the ride.

“Should we start our fight?” Caspar whispered, gaze swiveling back to Catherine for the moment. While the weapons provided were of the ‘training’ variety, they could still pack quite a punch in the right (or would that be wrong?) hands. Care would need to be ta-

Catherine's practice sword came dangerously close to the fighter’s chest, forcing him to retaliate with a swing of his own. “Fine then.”   
Of course, that also got Caspar an arrow coming very close to his body. Looking up to where he thought the suspected archer was, he shot her a look. Not that Shamir could actually see it. If she could, that would actually be pretty impressive. Guess there would be some kind of use to it in combat situations, but it would probably get in the way most of the time.

As those three got into it, Mercedes maneuvered the van to the back.

“Is our next team ready? Byleth remarked, Linhardt, Hubert and Ferdinand stepping towards the car door. Pulling it open, our trio bail on out. A lot more graceful than that of Catherine or Caspar, two of the three boys got to pulling out their sto- It’s not that funny. If it was, you would’ve heard it from Orochi or something. You know how she gets with that stuff. Especially when she’s around me of all people. Just because I’m old doesn’t mean you should make fun of me. At all. I could turn you into my teddy bear. No Mozu, I will not turn you into my teddy bear. Yes, you would be absolutely cute and divine… for a couple of hours. Anything more than that would be absolute overkill. It probably would kill you as well. I’ve heard many horror stories in that regard of mages accidentally turning loved ones and spouses into inanimate objects… or worse, monsters. Monsters that accidentally kill them and go on killing rampages. How the heck do you think Faceless came to be? Some idiot thought it was a great idea to have servants with faces that were large golems of clay. Then they all killed their masters, so King Garon was all like “Sell me 20 of those things” or something along those lines. Okay, he probably didn’t say that, but you get my point. Oh dear. I’ve seemed to have gotten on quite a tangent.

For the moment, our trio is attempting to break through one of the museum’s walls. Not entirely sure the people running the place would be fine with that. Especially as Ferdinand is currently in the process of slamming a spear into said stones.

“You think that’s enough stones?” Linhardt remarked, Hubert’s gaze shifting to the pile for the moment. Sure, they could easily add one or two more stones to this pile, but that would just be overkill. They wanted to blow a hole in the wall… not take down the entire building by accident. That’s a perfect opportunity for someone to sue and get you into even deeper trouble than you’re already in at the moment. Not that we actually know who this place belongs too. Considering this is where the one and only tea set in all of Fodlan is held, you would at least think they would at least have some kind of security for it. But no, some gang of thieves is currently holding it in a museum of all places. Not the most defensible place, I would im-

Of course, I’m prevented from finishing my sentence by Ferdinand smashing that lance of his into the stones. The explosion that follows is surprisingly bright. Like, I need to look away to preserve my old eyes. That’s how bright it is. Seriously, who the hell thought this was a good idea? It wasn’t, for the record. Not even the minivan stays to see them do the deed. No, they have other things to worry about at the moment.

“Ready to do this, girls?” Byleth remarked, Mercedes bringing her vehicle to a stop. Those left in the car unbuckled their seat belts and got up from their seats. “That includes you, Sothis.”

Sothis rolled her eyes and shifted her garment slightly. Why she of all people needed to dress up so nice confused her greatly. Unless they had some kind of use for her for this… heist. Yet, she was right behind everyone else when it came time to head on out.


	2. Busting through

I don't own Fire Emblem.

* * *

As outings went, this wasn’t entirely what either Edelgard or Bernadetta had in mind for what they were doing after coming back from Embarr. As far as they could tell, no one had leaked Edelgard’s ascension to the throne. Of course, neither girl had really been provided a chance to see if that was truly the case. Right now though, their focus was on other things. For starters, the plan at the moment. With both distractions in place, it was up to the girls to deal with the remaining guards and grab the tea set. Then it was just a matter of delivering it to Rhea for some reason. Better yet, why did it need to go to Rhea in the first place? This was an easy bargaining chip in Edelgard’s book.

“Edelgard?” Bernadetta called out, Edelgard’s gaze shifting back to her girlfriend for the moment. Handing over what looks to be a halberd, the empress accepted the gift. Nothing like any of the toys back in the armory. What she would give to have the relic

“I’m okay, Bernadetta.” Edelgard answered and found herself getting a look from Byleth of all people. Sure, she would definitely tell the professor what happened at Embarr… eventually. Right now just wasn’t a good time to drop such a huge bombshell. Maybe once she had a concrete plan and knew for certain whether or not her professor would stand with her through thick and thin. Something that might be able to be achieved through Dorothea. But that was a last resort. No, there had to be other ways to see where Byleth stood. “Just have a lot on my mind.”

Bernadetta nodded, attention shifting back to Byleth. Sword of the creator in one hand, child leash in the other. Going to be quite a challenge to fight with that. Especially when the person who’s on the other end of the leash is less than receptive to this situation and currently playing on their 3DS. Sure, the night skies might not make for the best backlight. But it’s still better than nothing at the moment. Outside of not playing. That's probably asking too much. 

“Hey. I was pretty good last time.” Sothis muttered, reluctantly slipping her 3DS into a pocket. After, her gaze shifted back to her mother. A roll of her eyes, followed by a deep breath. Yes, you were good that time. But then we also have the stuff at the foundry. Would that count as a proper battle? Yes, there was fighting involved. But the main goal was to just escape with Ingrid and nothing else. So a toss-up. Which in this case, means turning to my wife. Mozu, how do you rule on this whole smeltery incident? 

“Sothis dear, we don’t really have a good idea what’s inside that building.” Dorothea explained, a sigh serving as the child’s response. So for the moment, the opera singer grabbed hold of Sothis’s hand. A squeeze followed. That's one way to calm her down. “Better?”

Sothis nodded, gaze returning to the area ahead. Currently, we find our heroes standing before a side entrance to this ‘museum’. There’s no sign of any guards, but that could easily change if none of them were careful.

Yet as our heroines approached the door, what looked to be a stone landed right at their feet. Ice shot out from the ground, trying it’s hardest to ensnare someone, anyone at this point. Of course, the shot was not even close and the one throwing it out found themselves treated to arrows. Courtesy of Bernadetta, of course.

“Nice shot.” Edelgard remarked and cracked a smile. Sure, it had been a bit since either girl had actually seen combat, but they were still quite sharp. Just needed to get back in the groove. Whatever that means, especially as more bandits made their debut. Dressed in their pajamas, none of them looked happy. I probably wouldn't if a bunch of people were creating noise and trying to steal back the precious artifact that I worked very hard to steal in the first place. They did find enough time in their partially awoken states to actually grab their weapons. Have to make it a challenge. Or something like that.

"Hey! Some of us were trying to sleep!" a bandit announced, charging for Dorothea of all people. He isn’t too successful in that endeavor. Mostly because the stone she had thrown out had made contact well before the axe they were wielding even reached her.

"Uh… sorry about waking you up?" Byleth remarked, swinging her sword at a nearby bandit. But instead of hitting the bandit she was aiming for, the sword of the creator decided the best option in this situation was to turn into a chain whip of all things and strike a nearby bandit. Cool and all, but absolutely impractical for fighting in most situations. Especially if your opponents are all up close and your sword is refusing to work up close. Guess the solution would be to just use it as a whip - even at close range. Which was nothing on the weird weapons that Corrin would sometimes give me, Mozu and everyone else. How the hell are those armed with swords supposed to use a turnip to defend themselves? Sure it doesn't fall apart but it's still absolutely absurd. Especially when they should be armed with their best weapons at all times. Not that this really matters at our current moment.

"Take this!" Edelgard announced, swinging her axe into a bandit. Arm plopping off, that isn't enough to stop her opponent from taking a swing with her sword. So the emperor went with the next best option - hit them with the pole part of their axe. Because that's how things are going to be tonight. What? You've never had to whack someone with your bow because you ran out of arrows and your backup for some reason had forgotten also to bring you some more arrows. No, the backup was definitely not Setsuna. Even she can remember how many arrows need to be in a quiver… most of the time. Usually Hinoka will remind her. Not the end of the world or anything. Just something to keep in mind while in battle. Or just remember to bring enough arrows. Both work.

“By any chance, could you tell us where the tea set is?” Mercedes announced and pulled a bandit in. While there was a bit of struggling, Petra leaped in to help. And by help. I mean pull out her sword and point it right towards their opponent.

“Uh… Inside!” the bandit answered as they tried their hardest to just get out from this death grip. Not really successful, especially when the information you give is barely helpful. At all. Like seriously, anyone could’ve told you that. You’re going to have to dig a hell of a lot deeper if you want to get out of that grip.

“Wrong answer.” Mercedes remarked and flung the goon off to the side. What looked to be a middle finger was the response back. How rude. Not her fault you didn’t give good enough information in this situation. Thankfully, that’s the last of these bandits and our heroines can finally enter this museum. Hopefully our other teams are having similar luck for the moment or are already in this place. Preferably the latter in this situation. Yet, Byleth motioned for her students and child to follow.

Inside, everything looks normal enough. We have our boring paintings, boring statues and a bunch of other not interesting stuff. All of which was covered in darkness. For the better if you ask me. One thing to remember history. Another to store it in a place for people to gawk abou- No, this is not about that one time Corrin dragged us to the weapon place to get upgrades for some fucking reason. Or that one time we were out antique shopping and you found that painting of me. Just a coincidence that the woman displayed in it looks just like me. Nothing abo-

What do you mean that the back has ‘Ms Nyx’ on the back? Okay… I maybe had a fling with a painter. But that doesn’t matter at the moment. For some reason, the lights are coming on and some guy is coming into view. Standing right in front of our prize, there looks to be a hostage. Some redhead, she’s dressed in Gareg Mach’s uniform.

“If you want this tea set, come and get it.” the guy announced and brought out a lance. Just one small thing. The lance currently had a black outline around it. That can’t be good. “I’ll just be the last thing that you see.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, the redhead is Monica.


	3. Getting away with it

I don't own Fire Emblem.

* * *

For Miklan, this was the end of the line. What had once been his supporters had picked off. If anything, he was kind of disappointed that his brother hadn't chosen to come here. Maybe even repay the favor after all these years. 

Surrounded at all sides, not even his hostage could save him. Even if said hostage could, the bandit leader doubted that this one act would actually help.

“Stop laughing.” he muttered, the redhead's focus back on him. While the laughter does stop, he's fairly certain she muttered something as the arrows came flying their way. "Come and get me, cowards!"

Out in the distance, some kid with spiky cyan hair came running his way. Looks to be one of those practice weapons. There was no way he would actually do damage. Even if he somehow did, a little first a-

Dropping the axe to the ground, Miklan found himself treated to a stomach punch. Staggering back, his opponent grabbed the girl and booked it back to the far end of the room. Must be well… practiced. What? That was pretty clever. Right, Mozu?

Judging by the shaking of my wife’s head, that one was a bust. You could at least fake a chuckle for me. Yes. I’m aware it was bad. Cut me some slack.

Nonetheless, more arrows followed. Took quite a lot of effort on Miklan’s part to dodge them all. Especially as multiple attackers closed in on his location to kill him. Of course, these ones were armed with stones and other sharp weapons. This kind of feels like a full-on slaughterfest. There has to be some kind of catch to this mess. No way Byleth and company can just walk right in, grab the tea set and walk straight on out of there. Like that one time Mozu had to shovel all that snow for Corrin. Admit it. You were only there to just make snowmen in a winter wonderland. But no, Corrin made you shovel your way out. Why the fuck couldn’t she just burn it is beyond me. You’re a fucking dragon. You got to have some kind of breath weapon at your disposal. What do you mean she does? Wait. It comes out of her arm and not say… her mouth? Why the hell do they make this so difficult to really understand… Actually, that explains a shitload of things that I haven’t thought about in a while. Uh… thanks, dear?

I got a kiss for that. Totally worth it. I will need to make snowmen with her when winter comes around. She’ll absolutely love it. But right now, I need to be focusing on the fight at hand.

At the moment, it would seem that Catherine is the first to get into striking distance. Though, she has changed to a regular sword instead of Thunderbrand for the moment. Fair enough. No use wasting a valuable sword on such a lowly bandit leader. Or something along those lines.

“Take this!” she announced and swung her blade into Miklan’s thigh. Blood pours on out, muttered curses following right after. Yeah. That definitely left a mark. Even more so as the sword of the creator tore a hole into Miklan’s other thigh. That one looks far worse than Catherine’s wound though. Definitely not walking away from that anytime soon. No amount of first aid is going to save you now. Yet, why does the glow of that stupid lance seem even brighter than it was a few minutes before? Must be some weird trick of my eyes. There’s no way that lance could actually be do-

“It hurts…” Miklan muttered, staggering about for the moment. Kind of surprised his legs haven’t given out yet. Letting his gaze shift to the lance in his hands, he turned the weapon around. Fuck. That definitely can’t be good. “If I’m going to die, I’m taking you all with me.”

Thankfully, Ferdinand of all people closed the gap. Carefully grabbing hold of Miklan, his boyfriend attempted to wrestle the spear out of the bandit leader’s grip.

“Miklan, stop this foolishness at once.” Ferdinand announced and found himself treated to a glare for the moment. Taking a deep breath, the cavalier took the time to headbutt his opponent.    
“I understand you’re pissed about your father disowning you. But this is not the way a noble - current or disgraced should be ac-”

Yet, Miklan started to laugh. Definitely the worst possible time you could be doing that. At least listen to what the guy has to say before you make up your mind.

“Says the fuckboy who thought he could just seduce the goth kid without either one of your dad's noticing.” Miklan muttered, cracking the sort of smile that makes a person want to punch them in the face for doing so. Not that Hubert was going to do that. There exists far better ways of getting your point across. Case in point, carefully flinging a small stone at the feet of your target and hoping that it doesn’t hit your boyfriend. Which is exactly what our dark mage decided to do at the moment.

“Sorry about this, Ferdinand.” Hubert whispered and threw the stone down. Hitting it with his foot, his grip let go of Miklan’s hand. The explosion of dark energy was surprisingly intense. While Ferdinand was definitely caught in the blast, he took it like a champ. He’ll definitely need some form of first aid after this is all said and done.

“I forgive you.” Ferdinand mumbled, forced to let go of his hostage. Especially since he didn’t want his wounds to get any worse than they already were. Thankfully, both Hubert and Mercedes were there to drag him off to get him healed. Of course, Miklan was still laughing. Nothing about this is even funny. Not one fucking bit, you little piece of shit. So wipe that stupid smile off your face.

"So much for that." Miklan added, going through with ending his life. The spear pierced through his stomach, the rod twisting around his body. Darkness engulfed our bandit leader, his body twisting about in a grotesque fashion. This feels like complete overkill. I take back what I said earlier.

"What the fuck, over?" Byleth whispered, the darkness dissipating to reveal a large black beast. Head grazing the ceiling of the museum, I highly doubt any of the black eagles have seen something like this in the past.

Yet, Sothis grabbed hold of her mother's gauntlet and gave it a tug. Byleth spun back around, gaze focusing on her daughter.

"Battalions." the child whispered, getting treated too a look for the moment. To be fair, I would be wondering why exactly you of all people know the answer to that question. In the moment, it's not a big deal. Once the dust settles and this very important tea set is reclaimed, then you idiots can think about asking those ques- Yes, Mozu. I'm very much aware they can't hear me. This is more my personal thoughts on the matter than anything else. 

"Battalions?" Byleth answered and got a nod in return. That's great and all, but where the heck are you going to get a bunch of battalions in the middle of an abandoned museum. There's no way that Anna could just sh-

Almost on cue, Anna's truck drove onto the battlefield. At least she didn't wreck anything in the process of driving her vehicle into a building. Isn't saying much, now that I think about it.

"Did someone say battalions?" Anna announced, that stupid song already starting up. Really? These are the only people who actually would be buying stuff from you at the moment. You don't need to blast your theme song wherever you go. At all.

"Why yes we do." Byleth answered, running over to the back of the vehicle. Jamming her sword into one of the cages, the lock broke open with ease. Which in turn, let out the captured mercenaries along with the large beast’s attention. “Anything else, Sothis?”

Sothis looked away, eyes now shut. Images of dragons being consumed dance about her mind, the beasts caring little in the way of their culture and everything else. It hurts, it hurts, it hurts…

Eyes opening up, her gaze shifts back to the beast. In the absence of further advice, our heroes have chosen to whack it. Worked well enough, even if it did destroy the tea set. Not that this was really on their minds currently. No, just pick up the pieces and maybe put it on display in a proper museum.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And with that, Chapter 5 comes to an end.
> 
> For now at least, I need to take a break.


End file.
